Happiness Is Solely Within Your Domain and Control

Your Happiness Does Not Depend On Others, Things or Events 

Bob Marley tells us "don't worry, be happy" in his song of the same name, and being happy seems to be one of the key focal points of today's human experience.

Being unhappy also now seems to be a valid reason for quitting anything that isn't working out the way one wants (i.e. don't stay in a marriage if it does not make you happy, change jobs if you are not happy with the current one).

If Marley's lyrics are not a philosophy of life for most, then certainly the desire to "have a nice day" seems to reign imperative for many.

It is interesting to note that happiness has not always been a central tenet in philosophy or religious teaching. Back in the mid 1600s, Thomas Hobbes, in his seminal work Leviathan, wrote that the natural condition of man is "solitary, poor, nasty, brutish and short." Few in civil society today would depict life so harshly, though undoubtedly many in Africa, India and other regions would.

There is a significant difference between happiness and being happy. Happiness, like all feelings, is found within. And it is created and infiltrated by your thoughts and attitude.

The Greek Stoic philosopher Epictetus was one of the first to understand this concept. He wrote: "The essence of philosophy is that a man should so live that his happiness shall depend as little as possible on external things." Ideally this is how a Project You Life would be lived.

The very wise Epictetus also propounded that: "Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle: some things are within your control, and some things are not. It is only after you have faced up to this fundamental role and learned to distinguish between what you can and cannot control that inner tranquility and outer effectiveness become possible."

In essence, what Epictetus and many others since him postulate is that happiness is enhanced and enriched by others, but does not depend on others. 

This is an important notion to grasp. Your happiness does not depend on any other person, thing or event! It is solely within your domain and control.

This makes a great deal of sense when you stop and think about it. 

After all, external sources of pleasure, enjoyment and happiness are typically brief, fleeting, inconsistent, precarious, ephemeral, and highly subject to change. 

Looking for peace, contentment or happiness from the outside world is a wasted effort, particularly once you realize that true happiness resides within you.

This article is excerpted from the top-selling personal development book Project You: Living A Determined Life, available at Amazon in paperback ($7.89) and Kindle ($6.88) formats.