Happiness vs. Being Happy

There is a difference between the state of happiness and being happy. 

Seeking happiness through experiences and pleasures rarely works. 

As the social writer and philosopher Eric Hoffer noted, "The search for happiness is one of the chief sources of unhappiness." 

Adds English novelist C. P. Snow, "The pursuit of happiness is a most ridiculous phrase; if you pursue happiness you'll never find it."

Novelist Nathaniel Hawthorne described the search for happiness this way: "Happiness is a butterfly, which, when pursued, is always just beyond our grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you."

There is a difference between the state of happiness and being happy, having pleasure and experiencing enjoyment. The latter are short-term, temporary feelings based on experiences and thoughts. To put it simply: going to the movies can make you happy, but it has nothing to do with true happiness.

Helen Keller said that true happiness "is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose." 

From a Project You Life perspective, that worthy purpose of which she wrote is living a meaningful and full life, as defined by Dr. Seligman:

The meaningful life: using your signature strengths and virtues in the service of something much larger than you are.

A full life: experience the positive emotions about the past and future, savoring positive feelings from the pleasures, deriving abundant gratification from your signature strengths, and using these strengths in the service of something larger to obtain meaning.

The Greek philosopher Democritus said, "Happiness resides not in possessions or gold; the feeling of happiness dwells in the soul."

What else dwells in the soul? 

Caring, giving and kindness are all inherent characteristics of our souls. 

Perhaps, therefore, a key path to happiness comes from caring about others and giving kindness and help to others. 

Could these be the fundamental causes of real happiness? 

The greater our giving and kindness, the greater is our spiritual and innate happiness. Hence, increase your giving and kindness and you are likely to be rewarded with greater spiritual and authentic happiness. 

Uncertain about such a connection? Well, it won't hurt you to try!  

This article is partially excerpted from the top-selling personal development book Project You: Living A Determined Life, available at Amazon in Kindle ($6.88) and paperback ($7.89) formats.