Self Definition

Establish Who You Truly Are

In the last few Project You Life blog posts we have been writing about self awareness, self understanding and self esteem.

These are the three core aspects of self discovery, an important step on the road to a Project You Life Journey.

Ours, of course, are not the only messages on these topics.

The self-help gurus will inundate you with messages along the lines of:

Any day you want you can discipline yourself to change anything and everything about your life that does not satisfy you or make you happy. It is only up to you to decide to make changes and then to take action to instill these changes within your life. It's only up to you!

The Project You Life message is that yes, you can make any change you want, but that any such changes will only satisfy you and make you happy if they are predicated on a clear sense of self awareness and self understanding.

Otherwise, it is like putting icing on a cake. Doing so does not change the texture or flavor of the actual cake; it just changes the eating experience by coating the cake with a preferred topping.

In his book Zen Bow Zen Arrow Awa Kenzo writes, "No matter the art, the most important thing is to establish who you really are. That is, move from the ego-centered self to the absolute self."

The foundation of your own self definition will be expressed in your own self image. What you project to the world, and to yourself, reflects how well you understand yourself. The better this understanding, the greater will be the satisfactions you feel and experience.

For, as the acclaimed actor Sir John Gielgud said, "One's self-image is very important because if that's in good shape, then you can do anything, or practically anything."

Remember, there is nothing obvious or apparent in a caterpillar that foreshadows it becoming a butterfly. Only the caterpillar knows it is going to be a butterfly. Likewise, only you know and understand what you can or will become.

As Buddha said many times, "be a lamp unto yourself," so that you have the insight and understanding of a caterpillar.

And in doing so, always recall the words of Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, "We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing; others judge us by what we have done."

This planet is a laboratory of experiences and an infinite university of potential learning for the evolution of our souls. Use these experiences and lessons to cultivate a deeper, richer self understanding and you will find a greater balance and harmony in the spirit of your true self. 

This article is excerpted from the book Project You: Living A Determined Life, which is available in paperback and eBook formats at Amazon.